I stayed up until 5 AM on both Friday and Saturday nite. I have been writing songs and listening to the Walkmen's new album. I have been thinking about Diner Boy and trying to realize that it is never going to happen. I have been trying to be happy, while my friends fall in and out of love. And I am still stuck on the same boy, who can only stop by my table, say hi and smile at me for 2 minutes and leave. I have been invited to a "rip your heart out before someone else does" party on Valentine's Day. I want to wear pink and red and stay up until 5 AM and avoid love because it is too mentally damaging for me.